Thoughts about Berlin

1. Januar 1970

I love Berlin. And sometimes I cannot stand it.

With photographyI started to see Berlin, or big cities in general, with different eyes. I look at and am looking for little things, invisible moments and dirt in funny constellations. And with that, it became much easier and also enjoyable to deal with the dirt, the crowded places and the noise

I came here about four or five years ago, because I felt like I needed a new challenge and a new place to grow. It was a very intuitive and quick decision, although I always said I could never live in Berlin. Well, it turned out differently. But still, it was not easy for me to find my own path here. The city is loud, it’s crowded, it’s A LOT. It offers so many different opportunities, whether it’s about people, jobs, culture, or whatever. But for me, at the same time, it felt like it offered just one very specific way of thinking and living. It took me some time to find people who truly match with the real me — and almost three years to feel like I had arrived. In the beginning, I often felt like I was boring and that I would disappear in this city full of, let’s say, “special” people. But now, I’m actually grateful for that feeling, because it pushed me to think about who I am, what I need, and what I want. There are still a lot of things that annoy me or drain my energy in a way that doesn’t feel good, but everything has become a lot easier as I’ve gotten closer to myself. It’s easy to get lost here, but this place is also a really beautiful chance to figure out who you are. At least it was like this for me. I love Berlin. And sometimes I can’t stand it.